Bonus Dad Bonus Daughter

Why Embarrassment Hits Hard And How To Laugh It Off

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Ever feel your stomach drop over something tiny that suddenly feels enormous? We’ve been there. We take a candid, funny and surprisingly practical tour through embarrassment: why our brains treat a trip on the stairs like a social catastrophe, how harmless slip-ups turn into 2 a.m. replays, and the simple ways to reset without spiralling. Along the way we trade war stories—childhood stage mistakes that stuck for years, walking into a bin on a first week back, and public pratfalls that became family legend.

We dig into the science in plain English. Embarrassment is a social survival mechanism that flags risks to status and belonging. That primitive alarm explains the flush, the freeze and the inner critic. But here’s the twist: almost no one remembers your moment for long. Our takeaway is to own the blip, add a dash of humour, and carry on. It’s the recovery people notice, not the stumble. We put that to the test with celebrity examples—Jennifer Lawrence’s Oscars trip, Steve Harvey’s pageant slip—and everyday fails like reply-all disasters, Teams notifications exploding on a projector and AI note-takers faithfully recording that you “haven’t had a wee today.”

We also explore physical and verbal landmines: coffee stains on light clothes, toothpaste marks that never die, wardrobe malfunctions, and accidental innuendo that arrives louder than intended. Our practical toolkit includes: assume screensharing exposes notifications, set note-takers to internal, correct slips once without overapologising, carry a stain fix, and—most of all—reframe the moment as proof you’re human. Share the story if it brings someone else relief. Embarrassment handled well builds connection and trust.

If this made you smile, nod or breathe easier, hit follow, share with a friend who needs a laugh, and leave a quick review telling us your best cringe story. We might read it on a future show.

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SPEAKER_04:

Hello and welcome to Bonus Dad.

SPEAKER_02:

Bonus Daughter, a special father-daughter podcast with me, Hannah.

SPEAKER_04:

And me, Davy, where we discuss our differences, similarities, share a few laughs and stories. Within our ever-changing and complex world.

SPEAKER_02:

Each week we will discuss a topic from our own point of view and influences throughout the decades.

SPEAKER_04:

Or you could choose one by contacting us.

SPEAKER_02:

Via email, Instagram, Facebook, or TikTok. Links in bio. We use the clapperboard. That was exciting. Yeah. Welcome to a very special episode of Bonus Dad, Bonus Daughter. We are here to talk about our in our embarrassing stories.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah, we've got some embarrassing stories.

SPEAKER_02:

Well, I'm sure I can think of some. I'm a very embarrassing person.

SPEAKER_04:

I've got I've got a couple that I thought of the other day of really embarrassing stories. Of you or me? Of me, of me, things that I've done. Okay. But also it's um but yeah, generally what embarrassing things people have done. I've got a few famous people embarrassing stories and a few bits and bobs.

SPEAKER_01:

I like it.

SPEAKER_04:

I've even, because I know for well you've not read this, is I've even gone into a little bit of the psychology behind why we get embarrassed at these types of things. Okay, okay. So you you were gonna think of a of a couple, have you? But that was really funny, actually, because on the message when I messaged you and said I've I've come up with a podcast idea of embarrassing stories, what did you say to me?

SPEAKER_02:

I'm just one big embarrassment.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, yeah. So I'm pretty certain I can uh I can share a few embarrassing moments in my life without prompts, really. Yes.

SPEAKER_04:

Um but we have, haven't we? Everybody has done something where you just wanted the ground to just swallow you whole and you've just cringed so much. Yeah, it happens to us all.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, yes.

SPEAKER_04:

So a little bit behind the psychology of embarrassment.

SPEAKER_02:

Yes.

SPEAKER_04:

Before we get into the really funny stuff, the the the cringy stuff. Yes, so there's uh something called a surviv a social survival mechanism. Okay, and it means basically when something embarrassing happens, you immediately think that your social standing might be at risk. Yes, because you're being ridiculed or that some people are going to ridicule you. Yes, and it's also part of um evolution to for you to help to avoid rejection within those social standings as well. So it's primitive, it is quite primitive. It is a it's an automatic brain function embarrassment. It is indeed, and it's but part of your brain, it kind of it's it's that self-monitoring, it's that self-assessing part of your brain that comes into effect when you when you get embarrassed about something.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, so self-esteem.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah, because you also get embarrassed on behalf of other people as well, don't you?

SPEAKER_02:

Oh my god, second-hand embarrassment is that. Second hand embarrassment, yeah.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah. But but really when you think about it, how much do people really care?

SPEAKER_02:

Exactly.

SPEAKER_04:

They really don't. Yeah, I think you overstimulate your own brain in that in that aspect.

SPEAKER_02:

There well, the first thing I thought of when I was thinking about embarrassing moments when you just mentioned it, was something that happened to me in year two, and I know it was year two because I remember the teacher, yeah, and I remember it was Mrs. Winter, or Miss Winter then, I don't know what her name is now, I'm pretty certain she got married. Um, and I remember there was like a school, like not I think it was like a talent shows type thing. Okay. And do you remember that old like nursery rhyme that was like, Mrs. White had a fright in the middle of the night?

SPEAKER_03:

No.

SPEAKER_02:

Oh, saw a ghost eating toast halfway up a lamppost. Never heard that. Silly little thing. I can't remember if it was the school made it up or we made it up, and anyway, I was Mrs. White dressed as Mrs. White. Yeah. And I thought that my cue to go on stage was was then, but then I realised that it was the same person that was playing Mr. Black in the in the thing, because it was Mr. Black had a cat with a hat or something. I don't know, and he was on stage, but he was doing his his before act, which was like his I don't know, talent, I guess, for the show. Yeah. And I stepped forward and then I was embarrassed because I realised that I'd stepped forward too early, and I stepped back. Now I know for a fact that there is no one that wouldn't remember. I don't remember that. But for some reason that sticks in my brain as I made a mistake on stage, and that's horrible.

SPEAKER_04:

Is it one of those two o'clock in the morning thoughts that invades your mind?

SPEAKER_02:

I don't know why I get so embarrassed. What does your brain do then? I don't know. Like it's it's I mean, it was embarrassing for me, I guess, because I was but because I made a mistake. Maybe it was because I made a mistake. It was more, I don't know, like but yeah. And I'm pretty certain for a fact. If I ask Ellie, she will not remember that.

SPEAKER_04:

No, actually, I think you've mentioned that before. And you said you mentioned Ellie last time and you said, you know, she's gonna be able to do it. Oh, maybe yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. But I mean the reality of it is people forget things pretty quickly. Yeah. Other than yourself. Yeah. You know, like you say, you like we did this about when in the memory episode when we were saying about when people remember things and people remember things differently. Yeah. It's probably it probably wasn't even that bad, but in your own mind, it was like the worst thing that could possibly happen.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah. But but I must admit, you know, when you look at it from the flip side, when somebody does something stupid and you know, and you laugh at them, it actually in a kind of weird way brings you closer to them as well.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, you're like, oh, you're human and you're real.

SPEAKER_04:

Exactly. You do mess up, you know, and you do and and it sometimes, you know, when you when you laugh when somebody does something embarrassing, it's you're laughing at the situation, you're not laughing at them. No, no, it's just a funny situation, isn't it?

SPEAKER_02:

I remember it's like when someone falls over on the ice or not hurt themselves in sick form, like it loads of new people came into the school, so you kind of wanted to be a certain thing. I walked into the bin, like they were those massive, like black school bins. I walked into a bin and I was like, oh my god, ground swallow me whole lot. And I remember feeling really embarrassed about it because I was like on my way to the office and loads of people like sniggered because I'd walked into the bin. But again, I don't think anyone remembers me walking into that bin, but for some reason I've just remembered it and gone, oh like it was just like oh like one of the worst situations.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah, no one remembers it. It's like, can you remember when we had that party at ours and had a load of people from work come over and we had that very clean window, and a certain colleague of mine walked into the patio doors.

SPEAKER_02:

See, I wasn't there for that. I think I went to bed, but I do remember the smudge of her makeup on the uh on the screen the next day, which was a perfect imprint of her squashed face, and that was very, very funny.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah, she wasn't even drunk at that point. She was just because the because the glass door was so clean, she just walked straight into it thinking it was open.

SPEAKER_02:

If anything, that's a testament to mum's cleaning. Yeah, exactly.

SPEAKER_04:

Exactly, exactly. Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

Sorry, I demailed.

SPEAKER_04:

Oh, talking about cleaning. Have you seen Hillary's latest reel?

SPEAKER_02:

Uh probably.

SPEAKER_04:

So the cleaning, you know, she does the cleaning side of things.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, I mean she does a lot of cleaning, so you're gonna have to be a bit more stressful.

SPEAKER_04:

So the one that she's released today is really funny.

SPEAKER_02:

Oh, I haven't seen today. Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_04:

The one that she's released today saying about how um so how it stresses her out, how she gets stressed out before the in-laws come over.

SPEAKER_02:

Oh yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_04:

And immediately on our family chat, she's gone, I don't really mean it. I don't get stressy.

SPEAKER_02:

I mean, I get stressed before you come over. I guess sometimes I'm like, oh my god, have I hoovered? Or like, you know, it's just that thing, isn't it?

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah, it's it's really funny, actually. Yeah, because uh then I just then Amanda just said uh, you know, we oh yeah, I I you know, don't we all? Or whatever. And I just went, nope.

SPEAKER_02:

I don't care enough.

SPEAKER_04:

Nope. Um sorry, back to so back to back to embarrassment. Uh so you can feel a little bit of shame, can't you? Yeah. You can feel shame from it. So shame versus embarrassment, yeah, because it makes you feel bad about who you are.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, I think it depends on the context of the embarrassing moment as well. Like it could be literally walking into a bin like I did, or it could be you've done something wrong, like the thing on stage. Exactly. I think there's two different categories there. It's like, oh I've done something wrong.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah, yeah. So shall we go through some uh real life examples?

SPEAKER_02:

Yes, let's do it.

SPEAKER_04:

So I've got some uh I say I got these. I did ask ChatGPG actually to come up with some in its come up with three examples. So in 2013, Jennifer Lawrence at the Oscars, although a lot of stuff that she does is embarrassing. Yes, yeah, yeah. Um, she tripped whilst walking up the stairs to collect her Oscar. Yes, she remember that. She did, I do remember that, and she buggered straight over, and that was funny.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, on the stairs. But do you I think Jennifer Lawrence, because she has quite a lot of embarrassing moments, she plays it off so well.

SPEAKER_04:

She does.

SPEAKER_02:

She she really almost plays into it.

SPEAKER_04:

Almost like that awkward persona that she's got.

SPEAKER_02:

She's definitely got that patented.

SPEAKER_04:

There's that time when she got up to the microphone and she's just standing there and she just says to her, What do I do?

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, well I ask me questions, it's so awkward. Yeah, I really like um Jennifer Lawrence when who's who's here? Is Johnny? What's his name in real life? Oh, Jack Nickel oh Jack. Jacqueline Nicholson. Yeah, and um he goes, Oh, sorry, I thought you looked like a like uh an old girlfriend. She went, Can I be a new girlfriend? like that. And she went, Oh my god, why did I say that? And you can see her like thing full. And then he just comes up behind her and says something like uh something really respectful, like more or less like yes kind of thing, but respectfully.

SPEAKER_04:

And she just goes, Oh my god.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, she goes, Oh my god. That's so funny.

SPEAKER_04:

But the thing is, I do that quite a lot, you know, where I'll say something because it's an awkward situation, but I will just make it so much worse because my brain will just I'll just I'm trying to make this funny, but I've made it more awkward. Exactly, yeah, yeah. Try to make light of the situation, but it's and that is one of my embarrassing stories. Okay, okay. Something that I said, and your mum, bless her, we'll come on to that in a little while. Okay. Um, in 2015, have you heard of Steve Harvey?

SPEAKER_02:

Yes.

SPEAKER_04:

Yes, he announced the wrong winner at the 2015 Miss Universe contest.

SPEAKER_02:

So did he have like the wrong winner on his piece of paper? Like, how did that or did he just say the wrong name?

SPEAKER_04:

I think he said probably said the wrong name because it probably got winner runner up on the same thing that he probably said the wrong thing.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, that that was quite awkward, like crown yeah the crown moving across the other person. The one thing I thought you were gonna say about Miss Universe before I read the rest of it was do you remember when the oh god, this is so bad, but they were all lining up and they all say their country name. And it's like Argentina, and then she goes, France! Yeah, I remember that one.

SPEAKER_04:

Scared the shit out of me.

SPEAKER_01:

The whole audience just went, what she's like, Argentina, Albania, France That poor woman.

SPEAKER_02:

I'm so sorry. Sorry, but that was so funny. Oh yeah. I don't know how I'd say because I assume they say United Kingdom for us. It's not England, is it? It's probably I think. UK, yeah. I don't know how I would say that in a in a Miss Universe kind of way. United Kingdom. Like I don't know how I would say that.

SPEAKER_04:

But it's weird, isn't it? So it's like we we are quite strange here because you could call us UK, Britain, England, yeah, England and then Miss Britain? Yeah, Miss Britain, yeah, because we have got the United Kingdom consists of yeah, United Kingdom, obviously Northern Ireland.

SPEAKER_02:

But what does Britain mean? Does Britain mean just England? Is it just another name for England?

SPEAKER_04:

I don't actually know. I think I think it's just the same as the United Kingdom.

SPEAKER_02:

Oh, Britain is the United Kingdom. Or is it have so many names?

SPEAKER_04:

Or is it just mainland Britain and not including Northern Ireland? I don't know, actually.

SPEAKER_02:

I'm gonna Google it.

SPEAKER_04:

You're gonna Google it? Okay, well, while you Google, I will come on to some everyday life examples. And these, no doubt, our listeners, viewers, and us ourselves have probably done some of these, if not a few of them. So this happens quite a lot, where children are in a school and school classroom, and they accidentally call their teacher mum or dad.

SPEAKER_02:

Yes, happens a lot.

SPEAKER_04:

That happens a lot, and then everyone's obviously hilarity ensues as everybody's pointing and laughing at them.

SPEAKER_02:

Yes.

SPEAKER_04:

Then of course, you've got the the social media slip-up where a private post goes public.

SPEAKER_02:

Yes. Another Jennifer Lawrence issue. Was it Jennifer Lawrence? Uh her nudes got leaked.

SPEAKER_04:

Yes. Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't know if this one's more embarrassing, but more of a data protection issue.

SPEAKER_02:

Go on.

SPEAKER_04:

Is if you hit reply all by mistake in an email.

SPEAKER_02:

Yes. I know someone who listens to this podcast. I won't out them out.

SPEAKER_04:

Okay.

SPEAKER_02:

But she did hit reply all and gave everyone her uh mob uh personal mobile phone number.

SPEAKER_04:

No.

SPEAKER_02:

Sent an email afterwards saying, please no one text me. It was very, very funny, but she was like, oh no. Just to clarify on the Great Britain, UK, England issue. Yes. Obviously, England is the country of England. Yes. It does not include Scotland, Wales, Northern Ireland. Great Britain, Britain, means England, Scotland, and Wales, not Northern Ireland. See, that's what I thought. Yes, UK is all of those plus Northern Ireland.

SPEAKER_04:

Northern Ireland, yes.

SPEAKER_02:

That is how it's characterised.

SPEAKER_04:

Ah, right, okay. Which makes sense. Which makes sense, yes. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

So yeah, because when we when we're in the Olympics, we're Great Britain. Yes. GB. Yeah. So Ireland get their own. They get Northern Ireland and mainland Ireland.

SPEAKER_04:

Republic of Ireland. Yeah. So yes, so yeah, the office reply all mistake.

SPEAKER_02:

Yes.

SPEAKER_04:

Uh the We've all done it. This one I have done countless times. Accidentally waving at someone who wasn't waving at you.

SPEAKER_02:

Oh.

SPEAKER_04:

I have lost count the amount of times I've done that.

SPEAKER_02:

I am terrible for being the person that's waving at someone that's not the person that I think I'm waving at as well.

SPEAKER_00:

Yes.

SPEAKER_02:

I waved the other day at climbing thinking it was my sister-in-law and it was not my sister-in-law. And then I was like, oh my god, that person's gonna think, why are they waving at me?

SPEAKER_04:

But then I've done it the other way around as well. Where somebody has been genuinely waving at me. I've looked at them and I've gone, who the f they are they waving at me? Are they not? And I've not done anything. And then afterwards I've got a message from that person going, Well, just ignore me then. Yeah. It's like I'm genuinely sorry. Yeah. And sometimes as well, I have done the similar thing where some I've walked past somebody and someone said hello and I've carried on walking because I'm in my own world, and then I've got halfway down the street and gone, oh shit, that was so.

SPEAKER_02:

I know, yeah. Yeah, and that poor person has probably got really embarrassed. I've done it where someone has come up to me in the street going, Oh Yannah, how are you? How's your mum? And I'm like, Yeah, she's great. I am fucking buggy as to who they are. I know, it happens to be quite. It's terrible. But I think it's because you and mum know a lot of people. So I often get stopped and like, oh, you know, how's your dad? How's this? And I'm like, uh, yeah, they're great. And I have to play it off, and then I often text you to say, Oh my god, I I just met someone and they were talking about you, and I th they they looked like this, and you're like, Oh yeah, that's probably so and so, or that's probably so and so. Yeah. And I just play it off like I do know who they are, but I but I I don't, I don't. I'm really sorry. I'm bad. Sometimes I recognise the face, sometimes I just can't place the name.

SPEAKER_04:

And and do you have you got those people that you know that you don't actually know their name, but you've known them for so long, you've actually gone past the point that you could ask them their name. Uh and you're just hoping that they're with somebody else at some point and someone else calls them by their name, and then you've got it.

SPEAKER_02:

I don't actually think I do. I think I know everyone. I think yeah. Is it in your job?

SPEAKER_04:

No, more from the music side of things.

SPEAKER_02:

Oh, music, oh yeah, to be fair.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

Music as well, because a lot of names get tossed about, and then suddenly I'm like, oh, you're you you're that name. Like I then marry the marry the name up, yeah. But I think I have the advantage of I don't I've never met them in person, so I'm not always yeah. I think I've got that excuse in my in my bag.

SPEAKER_04:

Um have you ever sent a private text to the wrong person?

SPEAKER_02:

I've sent lots of texts to the wrong people, but I wouldn't say anything that was scathing or or or inappropriate.

SPEAKER_04:

That that text I sent you the other day.

SPEAKER_02:

Oh my gosh, the text, the the the the speech to it none of it made sense. I did kind of understand it when I thought about it, but it was just a jumbled up words, and then it was you telling it not to send it. You're like, don't send and send it to the side. No, I was telling it to send it. Let me get this. I was telling I was telling it. No, I can't, my phone's there. But it was like, have you got it there?

SPEAKER_04:

I'll I'll I'll bring it up, but it it was funny. It was funny. So basically what it was was I was kind of in my car, we're not driving, and I needed to text Hannah, so I thought I'd try the WhatsApp where you speak into WhatsApp, and it types it out rather than leaving a voice note and uh to then send a text to her, and it said this is verbatim what the text message said so on Witchcraft 2. No, I wrote an episode on Witchcraft 2.

SPEAKER_02:

Kiss kiss written out kiss kiss by the way, not xx kiss kiss.

SPEAKER_04:

I'm trying the automated speaking instead of typing, kind of worked. Love you, kiss kiss, lol, send, no, send, no. Can you send a message for God's sake?

SPEAKER_02:

To which I replied, fucking Christ. I don't understand any of this. And then I got a garbled voice note.

SPEAKER_04:

So yeah, so there's there's that. Um there's that. There's that, there's that, and then of course you've got the tripping or falling in public. Yeah. We've all done that. Fell into a bin.

SPEAKER_02:

Well, it fell into a bin, but fell yeah.

SPEAKER_04:

Yes, yeah, I hit a bin. Spilling coffee, food, or drink on yourself?

SPEAKER_02:

Oh my gosh, so cringe. I was at a conference with um with my old boss, you know my old boss. Old old boss, actually, sorry, before yeah, but prior to this career when I was um when I worked in uh housing. We went to this uh seminar thing together and they offered sliders, like burger sliders. The tomato fell right on my dress, but because there were sliders, they were slightly greasy and I had a greasy mark on my dress for the rest of the day.

SPEAKER_04:

Oh dear.

SPEAKER_02:

I went to the toilet, I used soap to try and get it out, and then under the under the hand dryer, trying to dry it out. Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_04:

The worst thing so embarrassing the worst thing to spill on you is toothpaste.

SPEAKER_02:

Yes, it stains shit.

SPEAKER_04:

Does not come out.

SPEAKER_02:

It does not come out. Coffee is another one, anything that's like dark when you're wearing like light clothing as well. Yeah, just makes it look like you shit yourself. Um yeah, yeah, I agree. That is one of the yeah, that is so bad.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah, um, forgetting someone's name at mid-conversation.

SPEAKER_02:

Oh, I Becca listens to this podcast, I know. I forgot her dog's name. I was having a brain fog day. Yeah, and I I am um I am an avid follower of Ruby's content on Instagram. I cannot believe I was like, uh, my brain just stuttered. I was like, how's Ruby? And I was just like, I've got her picture on the mantelpiece. Like, you know, I I just it's uh crazy. I just can't, I just forgot a name. Yeah, it's it's terrible. I hate when I do people's children, it's the worst when you forget their children's names.

SPEAKER_04:

So I I did it, so my dad does it all the time, and I did it the other day. And I my niece looked at me as I'd say, hmm, grandad also does that.

SPEAKER_02:

Oh no.

SPEAKER_04:

I called Annabelle Amanda.

SPEAKER_02:

Ah, yeah.

SPEAKER_04:

Because obviously uh it's her mum, but she looks so much like her mum did when she was her age. And I just went, Oh Amanda, and then Annabelle just looked at me as she went, Grandad calls me mummy. Like this. I went, sorry, darling.

SPEAKER_02:

Do you call her Amanda?

SPEAKER_04:

I call Amanda, yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_04:

So getting caught singing, dancing. Or talking to yourself in public?

SPEAKER_02:

I don't think that's embarrassing. I do that all the time.

SPEAKER_04:

I do it all the time.

SPEAKER_02:

And uh uh the people know this about me, that I am whimsical.

SPEAKER_04:

Yes.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah. I don't find that embarrassing. That doesn't embarrass me.

SPEAKER_04:

I I speak out loud sometimes. Again, because again, we've seen the whole thing about the inner monologue. I I sometimes talk out loud rather than have it in my head.

SPEAKER_02:

I do do that, and I and I there is there's a couple of things that I do that I'm worried embarrasses other people.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

So yes, uh when I dance and stuff, or I'm at a place where there's dancing, I will dance because I love to dance.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

Um and I dance like no one's watching. I don't really give two two shits. But I'm always worried, I always go to Mitch and I was like, am I embarrassing you? And then also when I'm playing video games, I cannot contain the excitement inside my head. So when I'm jumping and stuff, I'm like, ee, ooh, ah, and and and and especially games where it's a bit tense, like you're working against people or something like that. I am terrible for making noises and stuff, and I'm always like, oh my god, was that so embarrassing? Was that really annoying? I'm always worried about being either annoying or embarrassing, embarrassing for others.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

In the moment, I am not embarrassed, but I'm in I'm almost embarrassed for other people's embarrassment. If that makes any sense. Yes. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04:

Yes. Um, oh, there's quite a few more. There's quite a few more. Saying something awkward in a meeting at work and realising everyone noticed.

SPEAKER_02:

I I very rarely have meetings. I don't know if I've done that. I've been put on the spot in meetings and not known the answer. That can be quite embarrassing.

SPEAKER_04:

I'll tell you what what can be quite quite bad as well, and you have to be very, very careful.

SPEAKER_02:

Okay.

SPEAKER_04:

If oh god okay. You know when you're in a Teams meeting, yes. Right, and some something's happening, either like you're drifting off, or is like you or the subject goes off onto a tangent, or someone's being really ridiculous in what they're saying, and there's somebody in that meeting that you uh you are quite good friends with, so you private message them. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04:

Instead of the meeting chat, you private message that person. You have to be so careful that you don't put it into the meeting chat, or that you private message the wrong person. But the thing is, I know everyone does it because I do I'm very good at analysing people and watching things all the time, even when you're in a teens meeting, you can see someone's hand do this.

SPEAKER_02:

And the little smile from the other person.

SPEAKER_04:

The smile from the other person, or or where you'll see their eyes dart across.

SPEAKER_02:

I even do it, I'll write a message and then I'll watch their reaction to my message. Yeah. What what I was just about to say is the worst thing you can do is that I'm often on a call with my boss on a say a sales call or something, and they're screen sharing, but you privately message them saying, Oh, don't quite don't mention that part because of this and this and this, and then it pops up on the frickin' screen because teams like the notification comes up and I'm like, Oh sh like I forgot they were sharing their screen so they can see the messages that I'm seeing.

SPEAKER_04:

Okay, so I was awkward. So there's awkward. Right, there I was doing a presentation right to quite a lot of people, right? And there's there must have been about what 50 people in this room and I was doing I was doing a presentation on um on safety in general, right? So I'm doing I'm doing this presentation, and a colleague of mine called me, um and she called me, and it came up saying phone call, yeah, right, and I rejected the call, yeah, because obviously I'm doing a presentation, so I rejected the call on the white thing on the projector, it came up with the bottom with the teams chat. I just said rude, yeah. The whole room just absolutely burst into laughter, it was so funny.

SPEAKER_02:

See, that's okay.

SPEAKER_04:

That's okay, but if you you've known she is so dry with her humour, yeah, and she's one of those people that you can you know And I'm sure the people in the room knew who she was, but it's not yeah, but it was just you know, it was just so typical of her character to do that.

SPEAKER_02:

That's I feel like I'm like I can be quite like that. Like I'll be like, oh rude. I'll call with a client or something.

SPEAKER_04:

It's so funny. Uh what else have we got here? Oh, have you ever accidentally liked an old post when stalking someone's social media?

SPEAKER_01:

Yes.

SPEAKER_04:

See, I don't stalk people social media, I've got better things to do with my time.

SPEAKER_02:

I think for me, I will stalk people for other people.

SPEAKER_04:

Oh, you do you charge for this service, like private investigations?

SPEAKER_02:

No, no, no, no, no. I just like to sleuth a little bit. Um and then I'll like something and I'm like, oh shhh shite. But luckily, my name on my socials isn't my name. So I can get away with it.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah, okay.

SPEAKER_02:

A little bit.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

But yeah, I have done that, and then it's like massive cringe. I think if you get it, if you tap it quickly, it doesn't appear in the notifications if you if you realise straight away. Right. Okay.

SPEAKER_04:

Uh then of course the you've got the old wardrobe malfunction. This is the the skirt ride up, you know, they tucking tucking your skirt into your knickers. Inside out shirt, shirt button popping.

SPEAKER_02:

At school, uh particularly again in sick form, because we got to wear our own own uniform. It was still smart dress, but our own uniform. I do remember that I had a certain skirt that used to ride up if I wore a certain coat. Because it like just shuffle underneath and run. And I remember thinking, oh my god, my skirt is so short and pulling it down.

SPEAKER_03:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

Um I used to wear heels at uh sick form as well. So that was always a bit problematic, a bit temperamental if I didn't quite get it right because I was quite short. I've never had like I've never had the like the split trousers thing that's always happened luckily in my own home or like never in public.

SPEAKER_04:

Somebody at work, I know, colleague of mine when he split their trousers when bent down to help somebody, and you just yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

That's so funny though.

SPEAKER_04:

Stripey boxer shorts he had on that day.

SPEAKER_02:

It's quite funny. It's like, oh, did I choose is I feel like if that's gonna happen, you're wearing your worst pants. When I ever go to like the gynecologist or something, I forget that I need to put nice pants on, and I'm like, oh. You don't have to. They're seeing my mesh underwear. It's just not I know they don't care, but I care, you know. I care.

SPEAKER_04:

Again, this goes back to that people forget things quickly. Exactly.

SPEAKER_02:

And then medical professionals, they're not gonna remember what pants I was wearing. Exactly. I know what pants I was wearing.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah, they're not gonna go home because you're not gonna believe somebody came in today and they were wearing Primark pants.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, and they're mesh underwear. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah, all my pants are Primarked. No one really cares. Um, dropping your phone in public.

SPEAKER_02:

Oh, it's so loud, and everyone's like, oh, because of the screen, because they're so expensive these days as well. I feel like loads of people react to it. Um I actually dropped my phone last night and everyone was like and the baby was trying to sleep.

SPEAKER_04:

It was so bad. I think not only dropping your phone in public, but I mean I don't have ringtones on mine anymore, but I think just it going off at the inopportune moment.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04:

Like at a funeral or at a wedding or something like that. That's quite awkward. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

Especially when you're often told to turn your phone off or something like that. It's like I don't think anyone's phone went off during our wedding.

SPEAKER_04:

No, I don't think it did.

unknown:

No.

SPEAKER_04:

No. Nope.

SPEAKER_02:

In the age of phones.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah, um, when me and your mum got married, that m not ever well everyone probably had a phone. No, they would have didn't because 2004.

SPEAKER_02:

And they would have had the really 2003, we got married. They would have had really rubbish ringtones as well, like the old star ringtones.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah. Yeah. Don't remember. Forgetting to mute yourself on a call when saying, you know, again, that's the team's thing.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, I haven't done it yet, but I feel like one day I'll get caught out like, oh, this could have been an email. That was I know, but that's the Oh, actually, a modern day problem with that is if you're waiting for a client to come onto a call or or in your case, maybe a higher-up colleague or whatever, I know you're quite hard, but you know, I mean, I'm sure there's there's there's people that you don't want to. And do you have any like AI note-takers? Because they will write everything that you've said from the start, even if they haven't entered the call yet. So sometimes my note-taker says, No, I haven't had a we today, and that will come up on the bloody thing and it'll go, Um, Hannah, Hannah uh said that she hasn't had a we today on like the first line of the thing, and then it'll just go into Q2 reports, uh, and it's just like yeah, that's quite embarrassing. That's quite embarrassing. Like sometimes I I'll talk to my colleagues beforehand, like um I'll be like, oh, this client's a little bit late, and you think, oh god, you don't want that on the note-taker either.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

So now I've I've enabled my note-taker to only be internal. So I don't mean I don't mind an internal people knowing I haven't had a Wii, but a client, you kind of don't want that on your on your script.

SPEAKER_04:

Um I mean this isn't embarrassing, but more annoying, like with Teams calls. Like the most used phrase on Teams is you're on mute.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04:

The amount of times you start talking and you realize that person's on mute and you're just like you're gonna say it first.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, I thought you were gonna say, Oh, circle back or something like that, or the or the corporate speak.

SPEAKER_04:

I have written, I wrote an email, right? I wrote an email which is it basically consists of corporate speak, nothing just all those phrases. Yeah. Like let's circle back and hot wash and you know, going forward and all. I'll send it to you, right? Because it makes sense, but it tells you nothing.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_04:

I'll run it up the flagpole, yeah, you know, all this sort of thing. You know, guys, we need uh yeah, I'll I'll send it to you, you can have a little read of that. I might read it out actually on the on the podcast one day.

SPEAKER_01:

Okay.

SPEAKER_04:

Um so there's uh we've said about dropping a phone, forgetting to mute your call, uh getting caught making a funny face at someone.

SPEAKER_02:

Okay, yes. Yeah when I see a child in a queue and they're over their parents' shoulder, yeah, so the parent can't see me.

SPEAKER_04:

I do that all the time.

SPEAKER_02:

I will pull funny faces and then the parent will look at me like I am insane. And I was like, oh sorry, I was pulling faces at your child. And then I think, am I being a creep? Like there's a part of me that's like is this inappropriate? I know. And the reason she turned is because or or the reason the parent has turned is because the kid is like happy. I was like, Oh, sorry, I was pulling faces at your child. Yeah, I do all the time. Yeah, because they're just staring at you, and you're like, what am I gonna do with you? I'm just gonna go like this. And then the parent looks around and I'm going like this. Yeah, that happens to me quite a lot, actually.

SPEAKER_04:

So yeah. Uh and the other ones are pretty much we've already done them apart from the last one, accidentally farting in public.

SPEAKER_02:

Uh yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04:

Do you know what? Just everyone does it. Just own it.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah. Own it.

SPEAKER_04:

Yes, that was me.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, I I don't, I don't if it if it's silent, you can play it off. If it's loud, it's so embarrassing. Because they'll know where the sound comes from.

SPEAKER_04:

Last night, right, we were watching Telly. Yeah. I watched that new thing called Malice with Jack Whitehall, which is which is quite good, actually. It's alright. Anyway, I farted and it was really silent. And your mum just went, Conquer!

SPEAKER_02:

Oh, to the dog.

SPEAKER_04:

To the dog. Because we've got Conquer and Bracken with us at the moment. I can't blame it on the cat.

SPEAKER_02:

The cat isn't smelly at all.

SPEAKER_04:

So and I just burst out, I did burst out laughing. Your mum was like, Was that you? I was like, Yeah, that was that was me. I will I will I will own it. So yeah. So um I did actually ask, and they will remain nameless. Okay. Apart from one person, this was this was your mum. I did ask your mum, I said, Right, embarrassing moment, what about you? You know, have you ever had any, you know, tell me a story. And the what the only one, do you know when you put someone on the spot, it's quite difficult, isn't it? The one that she came up with was she said when she was 16 and she walked outside of a pharmacy, she had her bag open and she slipped, fell. Not only did she fall over, but all of her tromper came out and all of her tampacks that she just bought went all over the floor.

SPEAKER_02:

When you're 16.

SPEAKER_04:

And when she was a 16-year-old girl, she said she was really embarrassed. So the fact that she fell and the fact that it was feminine hygiene products and back then it wasn't talked about as much as it is now.

SPEAKER_02:

Personally, I if I saw a woman fall over and all their tampacks come out, I would just help them up and make sure that they're okay. And it wouldn't, it wouldn't even enter my brain space that they were tampons, I would just make sure her bits got in her bag. But as a 16-year-old, I can I do understand that is the time where you're so conscious about blood on the back of your skirt, blood on the back of your trousers, like things like that. Even anyone knowing that you're on your period as well, like it's so it was so taboo. Even back when I was 16, it was taboo. Not so much nowadays. I hope it's not anyway. But yeah, I can imagine that. Yeah, that is that is that would be embarrassing. Yeah, as hard, I think that would be hard to understand as a non-female or non-reproductive female. But yeah, it is very embarrassing.

SPEAKER_04:

And someone else who will who will remain nameless for to because this is quite embarrassing. I don't want to embarrass this person anymore. And it was similar to an email. And it was an email that she sent, and uh she meant to put in there we should just sack this off. Sack this off.

SPEAKER_02:

Right.

SPEAKER_04:

No.

SPEAKER_02:

Okay.

SPEAKER_04:

We should just suck this off.

SPEAKER_02:

Send I accidentally put genital man instead of gentleman. Yeah. Sent that. Yeah. Yep. Um, I don't know why I hit the I.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

Must have been close to the L, I don't know. Yeah, genital man, that's come out. I mistype a lot of things, to be honest.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

That's not uh whoever that person is, and if they listen to this podcast, that is not the worst I've heard. Funny though.

SPEAKER_04:

So um the one the one that pops into a head for me.

SPEAKER_02:

Oh no, you embarrassed her too.

SPEAKER_04:

She burst out laughing, and it was such an awkward laugh. And I genuinely said this so proud. We were talking about um, I think we talk so we're with an elderly couple, right? Right. Okay, and we were talking and we were having dinner with this elderly couple who are quite reserved, shall we say, people of that generation kind of are. Yeah, and we're having a roast dinner and we were talking about different types of vegetables that we we have on our on our roast dinner. And what's the one vegetable that your mum doesn't like?

SPEAKER_02:

Peas.

SPEAKER_04:

Peas, exactly. And I can't remember how the how we got to this point, but it ended up with me saying about the taste of peas in in dinner or in your food, and the exact phrase that I said was in front of these people, and mum said something like that. I said, Yeah, because you really should just taste the penis.

SPEAKER_02:

Peanuts, I get it, I get it.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah, and honestly, I said it, and as this the last part of the last word was coming out of my mouth, my brain was going, shut up, but it just came out, your mum went bright red, right? Yeah, and she just burst out laughing, and I just sat there and thought, I didn't I didn't flinch, I didn't say a word, I've said it now. I've owned us, I've done it, there you go. And this couple just looked and they were they were actually quite not shocked, I wouldn't say, but didn't quite know how to process it because I said it so loud, and it's just like taste the penis.

SPEAKER_02:

I think what makes the story funnier is that the couple didn't laugh.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah, they did not laugh at all.

SPEAKER_02:

That's hilarious.

SPEAKER_04:

They didn't laugh at all. I just owned it.

SPEAKER_02:

I think I know what a couple that is as well. I understand.

SPEAKER_04:

I just owned it.

SPEAKER_02:

Um I don't know if I've uh I don't know if I've ever like I'm quite a boy in terms of Brooklyn 99. Like I say a lot of things that I don't realise are dirty until people start laughing about it after I've said the fact. Like I can't hear it before I say it. Yeah. So I've said a lot of things that are like very innuendo, innuendo, but like, yeah, sometimes I say things that are just not dirty, but then they just come out and they sound dirty.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah, that was like when um uh you know when so I do this a lot when you say I'll do duh doh, you know, yeah. And the best one was Michelle was Michelle, your friend's um your mum's friend Michelle, because I do it all the time, so she started doing it and as a and uh she I just I said that but I think we were going out somewhere. I said, Hang on a minute, I just need to put the pork in the oven. And she went, I'll pork your oven. It's like what and on but again she didn't realise how funny it was until she said it, yeah, and it was just me and her and your mum were just crying and so childish, so silly child. Your mum did the other day, right? And I said, um I said uh I said because like you know when you put stuff on tally just on in the background while we were doing something, I was cooking, and I said to your mum, I said, What do you want to watch? And she went, Oh, I don't know, just put something on the background. I said, I'll tell you what, I said, let's put the next episode of Nevermind the Buzzcocks on and put that on. Your mum went, I'll buzz your cock.

SPEAKER_02:

Thanks.

SPEAKER_04:

I went, Well I thank you.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, yeah, there's funny little things like that sometimes.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah, it's quite childish.

SPEAKER_02:

Sometimes I like to say, like, I do remember the penis one now, actually. Because I used to say, like, I don't know, like if it's an acronym of something like um like map, uh map to the A to the penis, like like that sometimes happens. Uh and I remember saying P to the enus for P E. Yeah. P E to the Enus. Um, and then that obviously sounds like penis, but I can't think of like another I don't know, I just do it so often, and then people just laugh that I don't find it embarrassing anymore because people just know it's like mic work. I am boil out of Brooklyn 99.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

I like to think I'm Amy, but I'm a I'm a boy through and through.

SPEAKER_04:

You're a boy, yeah. Yeah. Um so uh going back to so why do why is it that we actually do this? Why do we replay these embarrassing moments around in our head? And it is because we think they're funny. We think that yeah, A, we think they're funny, but also it's our brain is trying to teach us to stop us from doing it again.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_04:

That's what it is. I think it's it's kind of like a defence mechanism.

SPEAKER_02:

Do you know what? I will never stand down from a bar without looking for the step beforehand so I don't get covered in coke.

SPEAKER_04:

Oh god, that was so funny in Spain.

SPEAKER_02:

And I think again, I was so upset because I I was embarrassed. I'd spilt an entire glass of coke over myself.

SPEAKER_04:

That's so funny.

SPEAKER_02:

I didn't find it funny at the time.

SPEAKER_04:

The best one was when you were in the back of the car.

SPEAKER_02:

Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_04:

And was it in my reverse? Quite sharp.

SPEAKER_02:

No, no, it went over a bump or something.

SPEAKER_04:

Just as you were taking a drink, and I just looked back and you were just sodden for me.

SPEAKER_02:

Dripping from my nose. I was just and again, I don't think I help matters because I just laughed. Yeah. I mean, I don't, I don't, I remember when I do you remember when I trapped my nipple in the ladder? Yes. I was so embarrassed because I was like, please do not tell anyone that I've trapped my nipple in a ladder. That is such an embarrassing story. But do you know what is the first story I go to when I tell people, like, well, I've got a little bit more comfortable with them, and I'm like, oh, you know, what's the worst thing that you've ever done? Like hurt yourself. And I was like, I trapped my nipple on a ladder. I don't understand how people have nipple piercings because that honestly hurts so much. I've I've that pain, I don't think I could ever recreate how much that hurt. It was such a shock. Um, but I remember saying to mum, I was like, please do not tell anyone this is so embarrassing. But now it's the the first story I tell everyone now.

SPEAKER_04:

I remember your um so not not your sorry, um a a a very good musician friend of ours turned their guitar off with their boob.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, it happens.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah, because you have the on button on the top of the guitarist.

SPEAKER_02:

They don't design them well for women.

SPEAKER_04:

No.

SPEAKER_02:

Um yeah.

SPEAKER_04:

So there's your mid mid and then suddenly the guitar just sounds When in the middle of this gig and she just looked down and was like, ooh.

SPEAKER_01:

My proof title.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah. Well, oh, can you I know this isn't really embarrassing, but this was quite funny. That day I walked out, walked in, and you're wearing goggles, cutting onions.

SPEAKER_01:

Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_04:

That was funny. Yeah. That was funny. That was funny. Um, and it does say here, of course, yeah, you've got the I've already mentioned it, the 2 a.m. replay. You know, it just it's weird how your brain does that though, doesn't it? You're not even thinking about it.

SPEAKER_02:

It'll just hello, remember this time. I think for me, my embarrassing moments are things that I someone has asked me and I don't want to answer the question and I don't know how to get out of answering the question.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

Sometimes I really struggle with the concept of saying, I'm not rather than saying I'm not comfortable with answering this, I just blub something out.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

And I'd rather just I'd rather just say, no, I don't, I don't want to answer that question. Like I don't feel comfortable answering that question. Why can't I just say that?

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

That's so respectful and so fine to say. But in the moment I'm like, uh, I just I just try and think of something. I think they're the most embarrassing moments where I feel like I've said something that is either not respectful and I've upset someone. That's when I feel the most embarrassed is when I hurt another, I guess, through my actions. Yeah. That's the 2 a.m. replay. So it's like, why did I say that? Why didn't I just say, Oh, I don't want to answer your question because I find it a little bit irrespectful, or even I don't even have to say that, it's just no is a complete sentence. Like, you know, I don't know why I I think of these things and like keeps me up at night.

SPEAKER_04:

Well, I think we should just kind of finish off with kind of how we, you know, how we cope with or how we should cope with embarrassing. How we should cope, I don't know. How we should cope with them and normalise it. Everybody does it, own it, normalise it. Yeah. Reframe it.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, just you have to think on it. Say, look, I'm human. It was funny. Is there anything in the podcast that we've done, although although you have highlighted as something that I have done wrong where I've sent the whole footage out for memories?

SPEAKER_04:

Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. But I thought you did that on purpose.

SPEAKER_02:

Well, I'm glad you thought I did that in purpose. I'm glad we didn't really say anything off air that was remotely weird. Yeah. But yeah, I uploaded the wrong footage. But um, yeah, I mean, uh sh shit happens. You know, shit happens.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah, so laugh at it. Yeah. Just laugh at it. Own it. Laugh at it, own it, own it. Treat yourself kindly with it. Treat yourself. Treat yourself, treat yourself kindly. And yeah, just just basically just laugh along with it and just say, yeah, it was embarrassing. But do you know what? So what? It was funny.

SPEAKER_02:

No one's gonna remember it really that well.

SPEAKER_04:

No one's gonna and anyway, you might become, you know, that will be a funny.

SPEAKER_02:

An internet sensation.

SPEAKER_04:

You might become an internet sensation, or you will become a funny anecdote for someone else, like many of the stories that we've told today are.

SPEAKER_02:

Yes, yes.

SPEAKER_04:

And that story entertains other people. So think of it like that. You are being creative.

SPEAKER_02:

Yes, you are content creators.

SPEAKER_04:

You are a content creator for hilarity.

SPEAKER_02:

Hilarity, yes. Hilarity, yes.

SPEAKER_04:

So there we go.

SPEAKER_02:

Well, if you enjoyed this episode of bonus dad bonus daughter, we have plenty in the bank on Spotify and other streaming services. We are available. Thanks for joining us on bonus dad bonus daughter. Don't forget to follow us on all our socials and share the podcast with someone who'd love it. We are available on all streaming platforms. See you next time. Bye-bye.